BONE CHINA pt.13
Rizz the bartender was pretty much intended to be a one-shot character when she first appeared to provide underground information/plot exposition to Scapula, until I realized that she actually serves a pretty unique role in the series. She’s someone Scap can talk to about subject matters that he wouldn’t dare discuss with any of his usual company.
Although Scapula normally associates with the likes of Throgor, Hypnausea, and other supervillains, it’s still important to remember that these are all vicious criminals who would easily turn on each other at a moment’s notice. Letting a group of bastards like them know that you have a new lover is pretty much setting her up to be a potential hostage or, worse, a target.
Rizz isn’t exactly a super-close friend of Scapula’s (she just likes chatting with any of her regular customers), but her role as one of his few female confidantes is why I like using her from time to time.
I do like seeing Scap feeling so good that he has a true cat-who-ate-the-canary grin like he has in panel 1. No, not the one in panel 4, that just makes me want to slap him a couple times, out of reflex.
It’s about time. Pity it makes the twitching at the back of my neck even worse. Talk about waiting for the other shoe to drop … I’m wondering if the shoe will have an anvil in it.
I think if most of us saw ANYONE with that kind of s__t-eating grin we would want to slap them silly. I think Rizz is just a tad more forgiving, since she’s probably never seen him smile before.
Come now, friends, are you really expecting the worse to happen? It could work out this time! Maybe! Possibly!
hehe smugface scapula is awesome
He’s liable to crack his face wide open if he keeps up that stoopud smile!
YES! Been waiting for Rizz to show up again. She reminds me of a lot of my old bartenders. You gotta be a special breed to be a drink-slinger in a criminal bar, let me tell you.
For a start you gotta be tough enough to break your average tough-guy into small pieces, but friendly enough to get along with the crowd. And when you deal with those kind, well….. you gotta be Rizz, hehehehehehehe. What can I say, hun, you do a fantastic job of capturing the feel of a lowlife watering hole!
….Too bad Scap isn’t bright enough to pay some attention. When your local source tells you someone hangs out with a rough crowd, you invest in groin protection (yes, ladies, you too) and consider carrying a good length of chain in your pocket. It MIGHT be overly cautious. It MIGHT save your neck.
‘Overly-cautious’ does a world of good in this world without good, and if Scap had half a brain he would harken the advice of the wise ol’ lesbian bartender (and Lady Jenn, too). In the meantime I think he just wanted to brag to someone about getting action, and the crazy guy who yells at the sidewalk didn’t feel like chatting with him.
Rizz is nice to use because I’ve been trying to expand the cast outside of just the villains, monsters, and gangsters, and while she associates with those types she’s still sort of safely on the outskirts (for now). It’s nice to take a break from the fighting and screaming and just show the characters shooting the s__t over a pint or three.
Is Bone already on Match.com looking for her next tryst? Guess Scap didn’t live up to the hype.
Naw, she’s on her MySpace page. Yep, MySpace. Some weirdos out there still use it…and some weirdos still buy vinyl records. To each their own (weirdos).
Justin Timberlake owns Myspace
Justin Timberlake owns www. imakeshittymusicbecauseiamstupidjustintimberlake.com.
A good bartender is your best friend in the world… as long as you remember to tip.
Very true words. If Scap wants to keep all of his fingers unbroken he would be wise to leave her a nice tip!
Scap on cutsie face mode is kinda disgusting. In Scapula world, would his mask have expression or would it be a grim emotionless visage at all times.
It’s a pretty grim face most of the time; in fact, I’d be hard-pressed to remember many other instances where he actually smiled (I’ll leave that up to you readers to find them). Believe me, he’s got to be straining every one of his facial muscles and really testing the plastic to be making a big, idiotic smile like that one!
Haha, you could print panel four an anything and I would buy it.
Aww, shucks! What do you say, folks? Would you buy a ‘stupid smiling Scapula’ shirt?
Actually I keep expecting someone to make a really dumb meme out of it (you know, like those ones you see on Facebook, ten thousand times a day). Anyone want to take a swing at it?
I’d certainly buy a mug so I could sip from it and aim beaming Scapula at people.
Or a mouse mat because I’d crack up every time I looked at it. Not sure about a shirt, but I’m not a shirt person anyway so my views are rubbish!
Interesting T-shirt Scap’s wearing…
I just took an old photo of Alice Cooper and redrew it with a simple design (the caption below reads “SICK THINGS”). I don’t think this shirt actually exists, but I still wouldn’t be surprised if I ever came across it.
This looks like the most vibrant Scap has ever been, both in attitude and color. Of course, his speech bubbles are still yellow.
I have no idea what’s on that computer screen, though; looks like an angry zombie caveman or something.
Who knows? Maybe it’s a mysterious on-line identity she’s made for herself…or maybe it’s Bela Lugosi. You make the call!
Scap’s speech bubbles are yellow because I imagine him having a grating, cancerous voice (comes from several decades of smoking and coffee-addiction). Imagine Starscream with a sore throat and a few packs of Marlboros.
Like those who commented before me… SMUG Scap in panel 4 is awesome! Oh, the silly! I raise my glass of Baerenjaeger to “love” also! And we really should get Squish and Rizz together. Bartenders made for each-other! I’d might put the money on Rizz in an arm-wrestling match, though.
Totally! For those of you who don’t read Squid Row (and why wouldn’t you?), Squish is Bridgett’s take on the ‘badass but lovable’ bartender. Truth be told I would rather take a drink from Squish, not only because she seems nicer but also because I doubt she has as many criminal connections. But who’s to say?
Oh… and eyepatches… Sex-eh!
You know it! Nick Fury, white or black, gets ALL the ladies!
YAY for manly hairy muscle-dykes with iro and eyepatches as bartender. She must be a star with the Ladies!
What the f is Mickey Mouse doing in panel 4? Kill it with fire!!
She sure is, but it’s best not to call her a “hairy muscle-dyke” to her face. People are only so forgiving.
Mickey Mouse?! Where?! Geez Louise, that’s all I needed: Disney’s lawyers on my tail!
I like to see Scap run around cheesin’ in the afterglow. I recall those days when you got lucky out of the blue without having to manipulate, beg, or coerce your date. He’s on top of the world right now.
The only problem with being on top is that it’s really easy to push you off into oblivion. Be careful, Scap.
Very sound advice, George. Here’s hoping Scap gets back to his senses before he gets himself into real trouble.
Your comment about being pushed off the world reminded me of that old Duck Dodgers cartoon where Daffy and Marvin the Martian destroy a planet, then stand on the square foot of it that remains. Daffy then (literally) shoves him off.
Thanks for the link, Dada… AND Squish could do you up a FRESH-squeezed limoncello… yah?
Sorry for the late replies, everyone below. Yesterday was spent traveling up the coast and generally having a stinky time of it.
Back to Squish: the only thing hotter than a hot bartender is a hot MILF bartender!
Nah, there is hotter than the MILF bartender: the NILF bartender – N = Nerd. Picked that one up from G4 when they covered a convention a couple years ago.
Seeing Scap’s soft side makes me all warm and fuzzy inside..
Awwww, fuzzy like a leetle chinchilla?
Go read Jenn’s comic, everyone!
His heart is about to go squish, like grape
Spoken like true Cossack, da? Make you feel strong like bear!
If any of my Russian readers are offended by that (and I do have readers in Russia, surprisingly!)…blame John. He started it.
Hypnausea and Tigadactyl don’t qualify as a “bad crowd”? One can only wonder who does, then?
Hypnausea and Tigadactly qualify as “geek crowd”.
Tigadactyl might be a little more badass now that he’s been in prison for over a year. As for Hypnausea, well, he regards prison as a bit of a vacation resort. All the sex and drugs you could ask for!
Ha!
Pretty sure I’ve been called worse things than ‘Fishie Fists’.
🙂
…but do your fists smell fishie enough to warrant such an epithet?
Forget I said that.
I’m disturbed by panel 4, you actually mad Scap look…. adorable! WTH is in my all fiber?!? [blinks]
Awwwwww, he so ADOWABUH!
I’m probably going to have to make some kind of photo meme contest for that stupid picture of him. Details next Sunday.
“Female” confidante is a word I’d use extremely hypothetically. So, who is that mysterious figure lurking in the shadows with the porcelain white skin, hmmmmm? HMMMMMM? Love the “just laid” face too I might add!
Female applies! Rizz is ALL woman…and then some! Hey, you are what you eat!
…geez, am I the most unintentionally offensive cartoonist of all time?
Is Bone China listening in on Scapula’s conversation with the bartender? Has she managed to place an unobtrusive bug on him? Or is that just, uh… poetic/artistic license, the speech bubbles overlapping the panel?
Is she watching him?! Now there’s an idea so paranoid that only Scap himself could suspect that!
I’m pretty good at paranoia, myself. ;`)
That “bad crowd” warning sounds like so many of those warnings you get before your heart gets ripped out and stomped on!!
The “bad crowd” line actually sounds like something mothers warn their daughters about. Makes you rethink the entire dynamic between Rizz and Scapula, dunnit?
The bad girls are always the most attractive ones.
Damned right! This comic’s stuck by that rule for years now.
Hm. Rizz reminds me of some lesbians I’ve known thru the years…. :/
In a good way, I hope?
Let me just say that Rizz is in no way supposed to be a representation of lesbians everywhere; she’s just one individual person. I wouldn’t regard her as being the SCAPULA view of lesbians anymore than the Dugong would represent African-Americans or Mira Mira representing cheeky Asian girls who like to chatter and gossip.
Hoo boy, now I really walked into it…